Here are a couple of examples to get you started:

"Getting rid of acid is easy," said Tom basically.
"I pulled a hamstring," said Tom limply.

"I love camping!" said Tom intently.

"I'm going to rake my leaves into the street," said Tom gutturally.

"I've never been in an accident," said Tom recklessly.

"Why is there a grizzly in this tavern?" said Tom barbarically.

"Hand over your weapons!" said Tom disarmingly.

"It's election day!" said Tom devotedly.

@Corey: I'm going to take your word for it that that's legit. I'm only vaguely Welsh. ;>

"I'm sweating to death!" said Tom heatedly.

"I have to go dig in the bogs again," said Tom repeatedly.

"Can this go by Pony Express instead?" asked Tom remorselessly.

"I'll be done with this drawing in a minute," said Tom sketchily.

"I broke my pencil lead," said Tom pointlessly.

"I have to study for my exams," said Tom finally.

"Can I write some comments over here?" asked Tom marginally.

"Thank you, sir! May I have another?" said Tom hazily.

"I really need a massage," said Tom intensely.

"I like big butts and I cannot lie!" said Tom cheekily.

"I still can't get this rebuilt Model T to start" said Tom crankily.

"I love to go skiing" said Tom solemnly.

"You better work it, bitch" said Tom fiercely.

"I don't see how there's anything wrong with wearing women's underwear," said Tom shiftily.

"Bring the lifejackets to the back of the boat," said Tom sternly.

"Know where I can find the sandpaper?" asked Tom abrasively.

"I've always wanted to be taller," said Tom stiltedly.

"These shirts are terribly wrinkly" said Tom ironically.

"This recipe needs some lemon flavor," said Tom zestily.

"You just can't get good pumpernickel bread anymore," said Tom wryly.

"Would you say this shirt is crimson or scarlet?" said Tom readily.

"I detest a run-on sentence" Tom said punctually.

"Get your Yellowtail here! 30% off regular price" Tom said selfishly.

"I got my tattoo removed!" Tom said ecstatically.

"I gotta take a leak," said Tom peevishly.

"I picked a bunch of grapes," said Tom divinely.

"I can haz cheezeburger?" asked Tom cattishly?

*cattily

"I'm removing you from office," said Tom disappointingly.

"I already ate my apple," said Tom fruitlessly.

"Damn bears, I lost all my money" said Tom sternly.

"Alas, once again my wife is not pregnant" said Tom unexpectedly.

"I hate all these seabirds flying around!" said Tom gullibly.

"I also hate prostitution!" said Tom horribly.

"OK, who farted?" said Tom astutely.

@Corey Hart: :>

"I'm moving into a new apartment tomorrow," said Tom flatly.

I hearts me some reth.

(Not to take away from rethwyll's creative genius -- some of these double-entendre Tom Swifties are ART.)

I hypothesize that any "-ly" adverb can be Tom Swiftied. Care to try to stump me?

"Nice try, but my nickname ain't Mycroft for nothing," said Tom self-referentially.

I LOVE YOU ALL. For putting up with my dorky threads. :>

@Mycroft: how about pulchritudinously? I was staring at that one last night trying to decide if it could be done. :D

"Why is all this fog hanging around the side of my head?" said Tom mysteriously.

"I simply can't study for another minute" said Tom thoughtfully.

@Moose: "Alas, once again my wife is not pregnant" said Tom unexpectedly."

"Alas, now my wife IS pregnant, and I need to find her a new doctor," said Tom ob-sequiously.

"Because the old one has a sore throat," he added obstreperously.

"What's five plus four?" asked Tom benignly.

"I haven't a penny to my name," Tom sighed soporifically.

"The lights aren't working" said Tom darkly.

"Man, I loathe that 'Road Warrior' guy," said Tom melodiously.

"I'm calling about the unprotected field" said Tom regardlessly.

"If I throw this TNT into the water, all the dead fish will float to the surface!" said Tom bombastically.

@-j. Now you're just making up words.

"Who the hell knows what's going to happen to my eternal soul once I pass on?" said Tom diagnostically.

"This is the smallest shopping center I've ever seen!" said Tom minimally.

"I need to change my car's oil without making a mess!" said Tom funnily.

@Moose: "No I'm not," said -j. INYOURFACEily.

"The balloon's no longer stuck to my sweater!" said Tom ecstatically

Moose jadedly threatened an internet acquaintance.

"I think I'm taller today!" said Tom gruesomely.

"Knossos sucks", said Tom discreetly.

@-j, @Moose: DON'T MAKE ME TURN THIS THREAD AROUND.

"I worship a faceless Canadian" said Tom jokingly.

"Ow, the top of my leg feels really tight," said Tom hypnotically.

"I believe it's some kind of fruit-based sauce" said Tom coolly.

"All hail the king of the gods!" said Tom jovially.

@Make Art -- that one is BRILLLIANT.

"I always liked Laverne's roommate better," said Tom surely.

"What was that McKellen guy's name again?" Tom asked serenely.

"Time to milk the cows!" said Tom utterly.

SO NOT doing one for "fallaciously".

"I asked that Eastern European guy with the lisp where he is wife was; she's in the toilet" said Tom sheepishly.

"These knives need sharpening" said Tom wetly.

"I'm in the Matrix!" Neo said woefully.

"I'm never camping in one of these pieces of crap again," said Tom portentously.

"I fucking love oil!" said Tom crudely.

"Make sure you check your man bits for lumps" said Tom (green) testily.

"I don't want hot-and-sour soup" said Tom wantonly.

@rethwyll Genius!

"Time to come out of the closet," Tom mandated.

"Let's do another stanza of the song," said Tom adversely.

"Oi that's my 'usband!" the cockney woman blurted urgently

"What is yooooour oooopiniooooon?" Tom asked morosely.

"She got nipped by my dog!" said Tom bitterly.

"Paul purchased a plethora of puppies," said Tom alliteratively.

"I need to scrape up all these bits off the bottom of the pan," said Tom fondly.

"Call that a hat? It looks more like a candle!" said Tom wickedly.

@-j: now you're just showing off. ;P

"We should simply replace the eleventh POTUS with Dolly Parton in our history books, " said Tom pulchritudinously.

I have a few other elements (involving fermented maguey beverages and being "rid" of "dudeness" or of "two dino's") but the sheer number of syllables makes it a chore to make a sentence (not to mention requiring a tin ear).

e.g., "The fellow on this fermented maguey beverage's label certainly has flushed skin."

"Could I interest the emperor in a cup of tea?" inquired Tom charmingly.

"Yes ambassador, of course we're still friends" said Tom diplomatically

@Mycroft - I'm impressed at the effort! Not to mention the fact that using "pulchritudinously" in a sentence is pretty much guaranteed-wedgie-ville. :D

"Give us dessert!" said Tom piously.

"I forwarded you a hilarious email!" said Tom resentfully.

"That stuff about the pirate talk is pretty uncommon," said Tom arbitrarily.

(ugh.)

" had sex with a celebrity last week. I haven't washed since" said Tom comedically.

(Sorry to lower the tone. I had to get it out of my head so I could move on)

"My pick-up used to belong to Lincoln" said Tom absolutely

"Apparently, she gave birth to a monkey" said Tom

"I'm going to look at your vents," said Tom seductively.

"Which of those books is borrowed most frequently?" Tom asked relentlessly

"Would you like to read more about the Jehovah's Witnesses?" asked Tom intractably.

"I gave Mr Smith some pills" said Tom tranquilly

"I couldn't possibly urinate more" said Tom peacefully

"I think this one is the queen of the colony," said Tom gallantly.

"Oh no, wait, it can't be," he said buoyantly.

"I made friend's with a fox!" proclaimed Roald fantastically

"I dreamed I was in a backstreet surround by fizzy orange icicles" said Tom fantastically

"Jane literate!" said Tarzan hurriedly

"This is the REAL colander," said Tom intrusively.

"Feel this teepee!" said Tom patently.

"I could put a talking tree on your cake" offered Tom enticingly

@Make Art: NERD ALERT.

"Please don't be harsh in your wordplay," said Tom pungently.

@rethwyll Actually I had to look it up. I Googled for something suitable.

@Make Art: CHEATER ALERT. Heh. ;>

"pungently" = GOLD STAR.

And I would have gotten away with it, too, if not for you kids!" said Tom shaggily.

"We're having baby cow again!" said Tom revealingly.

"Space, the final frontier" said Tom quirkily.

"I like my tuna seared but rare inside" said Tom officially.

"I think I'm going to start using Sensodyne" said Tom noisily.

"Pi for everyone!" said Tom irrationally.

"Wow, sex last night really hurt," said Tom sordidly.

"Keep that witch away from me" said Tom haggardly.

(also, I need to get some work done, damnit.)

@Moosebacca: you and me both. :D

"Best corn ever, Hopping Jackalope," said Tom amazedly.

"We learned about transgression today from the priest with the lisp," said Tom thinly.

@rethwyll: "That's odd, we learned about Norse mythology from the opposite guy," said Tom sorely.

"Those tattoos will last forever," said Tom mendaciously.

@-j: I can't tell what's worse: the lisp puns, the mythology dorkery or the Tom Swifties.

Ah, hell, it's all bad.

@rethwyll: "I'm as chuffed as that 'Pride & Prejudice' lady," said -j. osten-tatiously.

"I took your risotto," said Tom derisively.

"I locate things for a living," said Tom profoundly.

"My libido works at record speed," said Tom fastidiously.

"I'm drinking my Earl Grey alone today," said Tom teasingly.

oh god, they used to have a section of these in the jokes page at the end of Boys' Life magazine every month. (That's the boy scout magazine for those of you who grew up non-nerdy/female)

"Yes!" chanted Tom progressively.

@rethwyll: your skills astound me!

"Oh, I'm never wrong" said Tom airily.

@scurvyman: Everything I know, I learned from Boy's Life. (And Nun's Life, for you Airplane! fans. ;>)

@rink: ZOMG, thanks!

"What happened to my painting stand?" asked Tom uneasily.

"Hey, check out my Captain Picard impression!" said Tom engagingly.

<-- NERD

"I can't decide what to write with" said Tom penultimately.

@rethwyll Did you not see my quirkily stretch earlier?

@Moosebacca: You're all nerds!

"Check out my little tube!" said Tom vilely.

"I threw up in the lagoon," said Tom basically.

"My gym is really humid!" said Tom abstemiously.

"I don't want to sleep in a teepee," said Tom contentedly.

I don't get the lagoon one. Mace = dumb.

Another one for -j's pile: "This is one rebellious insect!" said Tom defiantly.

@rethwyll: "All these insect ones are driving me crazy!" said Tom antagonizingly.

@Moosebacca: sorry -- bay-sick. :> You can't even SEE dumb from where you're standing! <3

I love all of you.

@rethwyll Dur. Double dur.

"I can't go in for an angioplasty!" said Tom wholeheartedly.

@-j: "This insect is WAY off key!" said Tom dissonantly.

@Moosebacca: That reminds me of one I saw as an example somewhere: "They took both my left and right ventricles," said Tom half-heartedly. :D

"Why don't these size 8 jeans fit me?" Tom asked asininely.

"I'll let the grasshopper go first" said Tom hesitantly.

@-j: "Watch how far I can toss this insect!" said Tom flippantly.

"Old meme insect" said Tom irrelevantly.

"My dad just underwent gender reassignment surgery," said Tom transparently.

"Don't pay any attention to the insect and he'll go away," said Tom ignorantly.

"What beautiful pottery this hotel has," said Tom invasively.

"I missed all the insect ones, didn't I," said Tom belatedly.

"I'll give you the hint again," said Tom reclusively.

"I slept through most of the 40 days before Easter," said Tom somnolently.

"There's no more room at the hotel, except that room next to #7" said Tom ruminatingly.

"Someone dinged my door while I was in Target!" said Tom densely.

>"I'll give you the hint again," said Tom reclusively.

@rethwyll "It was Professor Plum with the candlestick in the Library," said Tom inclusively.

"I'm signing up for a second hitch in the Marines," announced Tom reservedly.

"I'd rather be on active duty than give up one weekend a month" Tom added unreservedly.

"These are not the robots you're looking for," said Tom adroitly.

"No, I only made one wish, honest!" said Tom congenially.

"That European physics laboratory isn't so great," said Tom discernibly.

"I used to work for a newspaper," said Tom expressively.

This one was too good to pass up:

"I'm image_imago's girlfriend," Tom proclaimed miserably.