Both Ex-BFG & New-BFG sent me friend requests on Facebook today.

My first instinct is to add neither of them, even though I really want to add them both.

In case anyone's wondering, Ex-BFG reached out a couple of days ago to apologize for the way he acted last week upon learning of New-BFG. He poured a few gallons of his soul out & basically admitted (both verbally & non-verbally) that he was realizing his mistakes between us & was acting out of hurt & anger. There were lots of tears, but also some laughs, hugs, & I-Will-Always-Love-Yous. We left on good terms, but I still haven't decided how much to forgive & forget considering how many times I've done so already. I know I can't completely shut him out of my life, but I don't know how much I do want him to know/see from now on.

Regarding New-BFG (only using the term because I don't like calling him Rebound Guy anymore... we're much more than that & even though we haven't officially said so, the sentiment of being a couple has been expressed more than a few times), I didn't add him because I know myself & how obsessed I can be with FB at times. I kinda feel like it would better not to add him because the temptation to stalk/obsess over his actions on FB would be too great & eventually consume me. Then again, I feel like if I don't add him it would be perceived as hiding part of myself that I spend a lot of time on. It's like telling your boss about Consumating... or admitting to your doctor how much liquor you really drink. or something like that.

I know this is the dumbest situation ever & I'm over-thinking but I'd really like your input!

oh this is a confusing one. I want to say "Oh, just add them both." but I don't know... maybe it should be neither? someone else's input is needed here...

You could always add the ex and hide his posts as a way of keeping that connection but not seeing his info all the time. But, I can see why you don't want to add him at all, either - but he'll probably be upset if you don't, which will cause more explanations and such.

Really, same thing with the new guy - though I understand your reasons for not wanting to add him, he might not, which will lead to more conversations, etc.

I guess what worries me most is the comment about stalking/obsessing on FB and GIRL JUST STOP! I mean, if you're inclined to do that, it's hard, but it doesn't help anyone in the end.

DONT DO IT!

You could block them both and say you've given up on facebook.

Having your own space to express and talk about either of them might be important for you.

Or you could limit what information either of them sees. It's totally up to you.

So I decided just to add both of them... but I'm not going to follow their updates & have blocked them from seeing a few of my past posts.

Que sera, sera!