oh man, i think along these lines all the time. like, at what point does someone move from "acquaintance" to "friend" ?
what about those people who you would talk to like, every other day or such, and you have a good rapport, and then they stop 'knowing' you? that confuses me the most. as a matter of fact, it kinda shames me. i feel embarrassed.
Most of the friends I have made since I moved here are just aquaintenances. When I first moved I met an awesome friend, then she moved away a year later. I am still trying to find a good friend like that who lives close.
It sucks because I generally don't get along with girls as well but definitely have more than enough guy friends. It is also difficult that a lot of people my age are married and all grown up and just can't make time for friends of their own.
I also feel like I'm always inviting people out but no one wants to do anything. Ever. Which is frustrating because then I feel like I'm missing out.
Wow, -j really said it. Thinking back a lot of my friends and I are friends because we got to that point in the relationship where things stopped being easy and yet we decided to stick it out to maintain the friendship.
Someone I consider to be one of my best friends isn't someone you'd think I would consider as such. Despite all the problems we have/had we work towards either talking out or just working out our problems. It's worth it. It really is.
I think the effort factor really is the main reason why it's really hard to make friends as an adult. AND why it's more difficult to meet people as an adult.
One of my best friends just moved to Ireland, and I am definitely feeling the loss. I have a couple of other really close friends locally, but I think part of what makes me feel like I should just STAY PUT in this town is the reality of how hard it is to make new friends who are more like family than anything else.
It is an amazing thing to have friends who you feel like you can really, truly count on, no matter what. It's RARE though!
I agree that it takes even more effort as an adult because we get busy with non-friend activties and feel we need to "make time" for friends. That takes a lot of effort especially in a new friendship.
Also, adults have more differences and judgments between them. I made a friend here who completely stopped being my friend because she didn't like my boyfriend. As well, I can't relate to a parent my age which is unfortunately limiting at my age.
I moved here thinking I could finally meet some really cool people yet it's practically been the opposite than other places I lived in.
All of my true friends from college and hs I still have though we rarely see each other. It's making new friends that I am struggling with.
posted on Sunday, Jun 13th by linty
Effort.
It takes time and work to make any relationship happen and most people don't value them enough to put the effort in.
Makes me sad.
oh man, i think along these lines all the time. like, at what point does someone move from "acquaintance" to "friend" ?
what about those people who you would talk to like, every other day or such, and you have a good rapport, and then they stop 'knowing' you? that confuses me the most. as a matter of fact, it kinda shames me. i feel embarrassed.
why do these things happen?
Most of the friends I have made since I moved here are just aquaintenances. When I first moved I met an awesome friend, then she moved away a year later. I am still trying to find a good friend like that who lives close.
It sucks because I generally don't get along with girls as well but definitely have more than enough guy friends. It is also difficult that a lot of people my age are married and all grown up and just can't make time for friends of their own.
I also feel like I'm always inviting people out but no one wants to do anything. Ever. Which is frustrating because then I feel like I'm missing out.
The beauty of love and friendship is not that they're easy, it's that they're worth all the effort.
Sadly, sometimes people have unrealistic expecations about the former. In short, Superion has the right answer ;)
Wow, -j really said it. Thinking back a lot of my friends and I are friends because we got to that point in the relationship where things stopped being easy and yet we decided to stick it out to maintain the friendship.
Someone I consider to be one of my best friends isn't someone you'd think I would consider as such. Despite all the problems we have/had we work towards either talking out or just working out our problems. It's worth it. It really is.
I think the effort factor really is the main reason why it's really hard to make friends as an adult. AND why it's more difficult to meet people as an adult.
One of my best friends just moved to Ireland, and I am definitely feeling the loss. I have a couple of other really close friends locally, but I think part of what makes me feel like I should just STAY PUT in this town is the reality of how hard it is to make new friends who are more like family than anything else.
It is an amazing thing to have friends who you feel like you can really, truly count on, no matter what. It's RARE though!
I agree that it takes even more effort as an adult because we get busy with non-friend activties and feel we need to "make time" for friends. That takes a lot of effort especially in a new friendship.
Also, adults have more differences and judgments between them. I made a friend here who completely stopped being my friend because she didn't like my boyfriend. As well, I can't relate to a parent my age which is unfortunately limiting at my age.
I moved here thinking I could finally meet some really cool people yet it's practically been the opposite than other places I lived in.
All of my true friends from college and hs I still have though we rarely see each other. It's making new friends that I am struggling with.