i run around asking who's it is, because you can't find Yuengling in Chicago.

Don't drink it.. it's a trap

Answer is easy: Quit, or preferably get layed off so you can get unemployment to purchase better alcohol. Ression 101 logic and economics here.

I don't particularly care for Yuengling, or most any beer for that matter. I just found it to be an entertaining discovery on the first day. It turns out that it was a coworker's leftovers from an after-hours party so it's not like anyone actually drinks on the clock.

I would nip some for my buddy. He's from Jersey and he would shit his pants if I procured for him a bottle out here in the middle of the country.