New annoyingness scale: Vonage vs. Magic Jack?

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Less annoying: Erin E-Surance or Flo from Progressive Insurance?

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Okay, so I have to rent a Rug Doctor today to spruce the house up for Thanksgiving. Now, I've never had much luck with these. I think they just get your carpet wet. Is there something I'm forgetting to do?

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When do we get our Absolut Los Angeles?

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Who else is sick of those Glade candle commercials where the woman has really asinine judgmental friends? Who cares if it's a Glade apple pie candle, bitch? You're lucky I didn't put ground glass in your casserole. Deal.

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I say we should 86 the compare friends application on Facebook for one reason: my ego. I don't like waking up in the morning only to hear that my friends consider me 100% drunk and only 6% cute.

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Is there a certain band or movie you like just to pacify your friends?

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Since I have no idea how to post my favorite music videos yet, here are 3 of my favorites: 1. no new tale to tell by love and rockets 2. rubber band man by t.i. 3. paper planes by m.i.a.

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Three reasons I need a boyfriend: I need someone to keep me from fucking up while building ikea bookshelves, I need someone to fix the fuse on our garbage disposal, I need someone to make sure I shaved the back of my left leg. PEACE.

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Oh Stylista, I know I'm too fat and old to watch you, but why do you pick the most tragic chubby girl as the token "other?" There are lots of us out there with awesome drug habits and killer social skills. Why not us? WHY?

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My main complaint about Twilight is that there isn't nearly enough blood, gore, or awkward sexual situations...you know, like life.

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Second time in two months, I pissed off an old bag at the Salvation Army.

25 comments.